When It Shouldn’t Be Gratitude

I’m on a few forums and FB pages where there are weekly thankful/gratitude posts and I really do enjoy reading them. Not only do they act as reminders to be thankful for what you have but they can also give you a deeper understanding of the people you interact with and how they view themselves and their lives.

What I have noticed is a lot of people being thankful for things that, whilst I appreciate, I’ve come to expect. And I don’t necessarily believe that I’m in the wrong to expect these things.

One example was a woman who had a car accident (where she was unhurt but the car was a write-off). She was understandably shaken by the experience and she posted that she was so grateful that her husband “picked me up because he didn’t have to.”

I’m just going to write that down again. She was so grateful that her husband picked her up because he didn’t have to. Um WHAT?

That is definitely one situation where I would expect my fiance to come and get me. I would expect that he would stop what he was doing and come to me. Just like I would for him. In fact I’d be livid if he didn’t.  Maybe it was the way she wrote it but to me it came off as if her husband did her this huge favour and not as something that a reasonable human being would do.

I have come to expect this sort of behaviour because of the way I was raised.  I’ve regularly left work early if my fiance or family have needed me. When my mama was really ill last year I would never ask permission to leave work when she needed me, I simply told my boss something was up with my mum and that I was leaving and would either be back later that day or the I’d be back the next day. I understand that for some people their jobs aren’t as flexible or willing to appreciate that family and friends come first so maybe that’s why I am confused by some of these grateful declarations.

But you know what? It is something that I’m thankful for. I am thankful that I am in a relationship where its expected that we help each other out. I am thankful that my family have taught me what’s important in my life. I am thankful that the jobs I’ve held don’t require me 24/7 and I can leave when I need to. And I hope that the people out there who feel that they don’t deserve that sort of dedication realise that they actually do.

Author: valentinabrenni

I love books, yoga, sunsets, feminism, reading, puppies, walking, wine, sunrises, financial independence, music and health and wellbeing

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